Cesar Padilla can always be relied upon to find the strangest, most fascinating American characters to talk to. In the following short essay written just after Cesar returned from the Lazy Bear Weekend in Guerneville, California this summer, Cesar details his first encounter with a mysterious thong-wearing pianist named Seth and his assistant Dustin.

‘On Saturday night of Lazy Bear Weekend, this past July, Matt Fishbeck, my campmate, and I got separated. He returned at 10AM the following day and told us the following story: Around midnight, Matt went to the Safeway Supermarket on the main drag to grab a bite to eat. As he left the Safeway, he heard music coming from off in the distance. What he found was two conflicting sounds of music right across the street from each other. On one side was the pulsating throbbing techno coming from the outdoor pool of the RRR (Russian River Resort) and on the other was the sound of a classical piano recital from a nearby building.

Matt walked up the stairs following the piano music and entered a parlor. On the back wall was a mural depicting the Russian River. In front of the mural were two grand pianos – a white one to the right and a black one on the left, and sitting at the black piano was Seth wearing a green tiger print thong performing. Matt shows me a picture to prove he’s not lying, and tells me to get ready and make my way to the 12 o’clock recital. I’m stunned. It all sounds too fantastic. Another member of the camp is also awake and also a classical music fan and sits next to me listening. The guy sitting next to me and I don’t know each other at all and have never met. We believe Matt and his enthusiasm and both decide to get ready and go track down Seth, leaving Matt to get some much needed shut eye.

We follow Matt’s directions and arrive at the space. We are late and Seth has just finished. The room is empty save for his assistant Dustin and Seth asks if we are here for a performance. We say yes and he graciously sits back down at the black grand piano and starts his recital anew. We are the only people in the room. Just like in the photo’s Matt took, Seth is performing in a green tiger print thong while at the other end of the room Dustin stares out the front window onto the RRR poolside party as it starts to kick in. As Matt predicted, we are enthralled. Seth starts with a piece by Chopin and within a minute my companion and I have started making out and removing our shirts. Chopin ends and Seth asks if we wouldn’t mind moving up to the front row and continuing our action. He introduces the next composition as a song he wrote specifically for the Bears and Bear weekend. It is entitled ‘Bearhugs’ which is followed by a dark gothic interpretation of ‘Rhapsody in Blue’.

Sometime right after Seth began ‘Bearhugs’, my companion and I are almost completely naked and in the throws of some man action on the baby blue carpet at the foot of Seth and his piano. Many minutes go by and the juices start flowing and the next thing I know the recital is over. We wipe ourselves off and look around. The room is still empty only now I have realized Dustin has taken a better seat during this afternoon’s performance. I speak with Seth and arrange to interview him and Dustin at a later date, but due to some terrible personal news I decide on short notice to return to the Russian River and camp out again the following weekend, this time by myself. I stop by Seth’s parlour upon my arrival and make loose arrangements to be there the following day.

Tomorrow: Part Two – Cesar interviews Seth and Dustin.