BUTT LISTS

A monthly catalog of post-gay phenomena in list form

30 Bottoms

Text by Danny Calvi

Beef on the Hoof
Bender
Bird Taker
Bottoming from the Top
Bottomless Pool
Bronc
Brownie Queen
Buggerling
Bull Nurse
Butch Bottom
Catcher
Cum Bucket
Gentleman Slut
Helium Heels
Homi-polone
KY Queen
Kothi
Muscle Bottom
Oral Bottom
Peg Boy
Pillow Biter
Power Bottom
Ring Snatcher
Sailor’s Cup of Tea
Sausage Jockey
Sodomant
Squealer
Tar Baby
Team Player
Total Bottom

30 Gay Beaches

Text by Danny Calvi

Baker Beach
Black’s Beach
Capocotta
Cherry Grove
Clifton 3rd
Coco Beach
Es Cavallet
Fire Island Pines
Ginger Rogers State Beach
Gunnison Beach
Haulover Beach
Herring Cove
Hi Beach
Hilton Beach
Hollywood Beach
Ipanema
Lady Jane Beach
Limanakia
Little Beach
North Bondi Beach
Obelisk Beach
Ogunquit Beach
Platja del Home Mort
Playita
Poodle Beach
Praia 19
Queens Beach
Smathers Beach
West Street Beach
Wreck Beach

30 Names for Bruce Jenner

Gena Jenner
Geneva Jenner
Geraldine Jenner
Geri Jenner
Gigi Jenner
Gina Jenner
Ginger Jenner
Giselle Jenner
Gypsy Jenner
Jacqueline Jenner
Jamie Jenner
Jane Jenner
Janine Jenner
Janet Jenner
Jasmine Jenner
Jean Jenner
Jenny Jenner
Jesse Jenner
Jessica Jenner
Joan Jenner
Joanna Jenner
Jobeth Jenner
Jodie Jenner
Jojo Jenner
Jolene Jenner
Joni Jenner
Joyce Jenner
Judith Jenner
Julie Jenner
Justine Jenner

50 Butt Plugs

Ace of Spades
All Dam Day
Alu-light Gold with Swarovski Crystal Heart
Aluminium Tunnel
Ass Egg
Backdoor Friend
Bendable Butt Rattler
Big Foot
Bottoms Up Finger Rimmer
Bum Buddies Booty Bumper
Canadian Ultimate
Cock Lock Intruder
Crackstuffer Gooseneck
Crystal Butt Bonanza
Dr. Joel Kaplan Anal Developer
Dwarf
Epic Chubby
Fashionistas Glass Rose
Furry Bear
Hardware Silicone C-clamp
Heavy Metal
Horizons Rainbow Core
Jelly Jammer
Little John
Lusty Plug
Man in a Barrel
Manbound Mini Horn
Metal Wörx Teazer
Mr. Big
OMG Electro
Pleasure Pearls
Plugster
Pride of Amsterdam
Pumpplug Zepplin
Quivering Queen
Ream and Scream
Rearender
Rectal Rocket
Rough Riderz No. 2
Rump Shakers
Shock Therapy Pleasure Probe
Slutmaster
Stallion Tail Ribbed
Tannenbaum
The Head
Tiny Passion
Triple Ripple
Two-Finger Fantasy
Vibrating Silicone Fulfiller
Wrackers Ball XXL

25 Gay-friendly B&Bs

A Safe Haven
Absolute Paradise
Babylon
Bacon Mansion
Bears and Breakfast
Bent Inn
Blue Lagoon Gay House
Casa Buddy Panama
Casa La Diferencia
Chaps Inn
Charles & Charles
Diva España
Eagle’s Nest
Golden Banana
Guysers Gaystay
Hung Homo Homestay
La Butte Ronde
Lavenda Breeze
Pride Lodge
Romeo’s Holiday
Sansuk Sauna and Guesthouse
Tommy’s Place
Truelove Resort
Welcome to My Place
Wonder World

50 Strains of Kind Bud

Alice B. Toklas
Andy’s Blue Dream
Aunt Mary
Banana Puff
Big Fatty
Bitch
Bubble Bud
Cheesy Dick
Chem Valley Kush
Critical Pride
Cum Clod
Dairy Queen
Donkey Dick
Drag Weed
Early Riser
Fairy Tail
First Lady
Fisherman’s Friend
Flame Thrower
Four Way
Fruitylicious
Grizzly
Her Majesty
Hercules
Jackhammer
Jock Horror
Killer Queen
Lavender
Master Chronic
Moby Dick
Mr. Nice Guy
Pineapple Princess
Pink Lady
Pounder
Purple Pistol
Rainbow
Red Beard
Salt and Pepper
Sassy Frass
Shagadellic
Smelly Guy
Soliloqueen
Sticky Sista
Stinky Pinky
Sugar Daddy
Super Pig
Tighty Whitey Bud
Top 69
Tutti Frutti
Woody

12 Days of Christmas Porn

A Very Boynapped Christmas
Big Dick Boys Make Some Toys
Blake Daniels The Holiday Whore
I Saw Daddy Kissing Santa Claus
Merry Twinkmas
Miracle on 69th Street
Peter North’s North Pole
Santa Cums Early: Volcanic Red Bear Eruption
Sex Toy Story
Stocking Stuffers 2: Here Cums Santa Claus
Trannyclaus
We Three Hoes

30 Dating App Profile Names Already Taken

alphabeat
Be normal
beefhead
Cummiebear
donttellmama
dream2catch
Drench You
EvilnerdTM
faggorist
gaggin4some
Hit-or-Miss
I Like Food
I’m the Daddy!
kartoffel
Lifecoachmasseur
LordOfTheWoods
manspam
nodrama
Oral Visitor
phoenixriseth
Shhh
Spanglish
Sprizz
strawbeary
Sunshine 100
Tough (out there)
Triplewhey
wag4me
wank cream time
WherevaWheneva

15 Halloween Costumes for Couples

Andrew Cunanan and Gianni Versace
Andy Warhol and Valerie Solanas
Bert and Ernie
Buffalo Bill and Clarice Starling
Dorothy Gale and Toto
Dr. Frank-N-Furter and Rocky
Ennis Del Mar and Jack Twist
Gandalf the Grey and Gandalf the White
Leopold and Loeb
Liberace and Scott Thorson
Michael Sam and David Kopay
Mr. Clean and the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man
Siegfried and Roy
Victor and Victoria
Zed and The Gimp

40 Bathhouses

Apollion Sauna
Babylonia
Badehaus Mann-o-mann
Body Zone
Der Boiler
The Bonbon Club
Casanova
Chariots
Checkmate
Club Hercules
Club Sauna Sunnyday
Colonial Bath
The Diplomat Club
Duluth Family Sauna
Flex
GI Joe Sauna
Goliath’s
The Hollywood Spa
Kaiserbründl Herrensauna
Menfriends
Moustache
L’Oasis
Octopus
Pink Beach
The Pipeworks
Pleasuredrome
Rainbow Sauna
Le Riad
Roman Holiday
Sauna 69
Sodome
Spa Excess
Steamworks
Subway Sauna
Sun City
Thermos
Vulcan Steam & Sauna
Wet on Wellington
Wet Wet Wet
The Works

Testicular Top 40

balls
bangers
bo-jack
bojangles
bollocks
boulders
cannonballs
cheese and crackers
Chicken McNuggets
chin bangers
clock weights
coin purse
cojones
Cracker Jacks
daddy bag
danglers
Easter eggs
family jewels
frick and frack
gonads
huevos
itchy and scratchy
Jackson Pollocks
jawbreakers
love grenades
low hangers
man tonsils
maracas
meatballs
nards
Niagara Falls
nuggets
nuts
nutsack
privates
rocks
squirrel bait
stepchildren
Thor’s twins
wank tanks

35 Summer Drag Names

Amy Housewine
Anita Salad
Auntie Bacterial
Bridgette of Madison County
Brooke Trout
Carmen Monoxide
Crystal Metheny
Cybil Unrest
Demanda Refund
Dinah Thirst
Donna Kebab
Hedda Lettuce
Honey Dijon
Izzy Inyet
Jamie Lee Squirtus
Jean Pool
Margarita Ondarocks
Mary J. Bulge
Miley Highclub
Misty Meadows
Molly Shivers
Negroni Campbell
Polly Unsaturated
Rachel Tension
Rosemary Focaccia
Sandy Kuntz
Sissy Spacecake
Sophonda Peters
Stella R. Twat
Sue Venir
Suzanne Somers Eve
Tanita Tikkamasala
Thuthan Thongtag
Vaseline Dion
Winne Baygo

40 Text Abbreviations

+1
2MI
420
AYOR
BF
BJ
BO
BUFU
DDF
DILF
DP
DTE
FB
FON
FWB
GBF
GHB
HWP
K9
KYPO
LTR
M4M
M8
MBA
NIFOC
NSA
NSFW
PDA
PNP
PVT
SIF
SOML
SSC
TFS
UB2
VERS
WS
WTT
WTYO
WYSIWYG

Appendix of abbreviations: +1, with a friend; 2MI, too much information; 420, pothead, AYOR, at your own risk; BF, boyfriend; BJ, blow job; BO, body odor; BUFU, butt fuck; DDF, drug and disease free; DILF, dad I’d like to fuck; DP, double penetration; DTE, down to earth; FB, fuck buddy; FON, freak of nature; FWB, friends with benefits; GBF, gay best friend; GHB, gamma-hydroxybutyric acid; HWP, height-weight proportional; K9, doggy style; KYPO, keep your panties on; LTR, long term relationship; M4M, man looking for another man; M8, mate; MBA, married but available; NIFOC, naked in front of computer; NSA no strings attached; NSFW not safe for work; PDA public display of affection; PNP, party and play; PVT, private; SIF, as if; SOML, story of my life; SSC, safe sane consensual; TFS, thanks for sharing; UB2, looking for same; VERS, versatile; WS, watersports; WTT, want to trade; WTYO, whatever turns you on; and WYSIWYG, what you see is what you get.

50 Types of Queen

alfalfa queen
amyl queen
banana queen
blue jean queen
bondage queen
butch queen
butterscotch queen
circuit queen
closet queen
coffin queen
cottage queen
crew cut queen
cum queen
dairy queen
drag queen
drama queen
enema queen
flab queen
flaming queen
gloryhole queen
gold plated queen
golden shower queen
green queen
gym queen
ice queen
label queen
last call queen
Lean Cuisine queen
leather queen
magazine queen
mile high queen
opera queen
peeled queen
piss elegant queen
queen bee
queen for a day
queen of da Nile
raging queen
R.F.D. queen
rim queen
rubber queen
scene queen
size queen
skin queen
snow queen
speed queen
steam queen
sweater queen
Tom Thumb queen
twisted queen

25 Terms for Asshole

back door
Batcave
birdcage
booty
boy pussy
bunghole
butthole
caboose
Cadbury cul-de-sac
camera obscura
cornhole
crapper
dirt box
fudge tunnel
Gary
Hershey highway
Hollywood uterus
manhole
poop chute
prison purse
rectum
road less traveled
shitter
wazoo
where the sun don’t shine

20 Porn Star Anagrams

A Dry Loin
Anal Car Rig Up
An Old Weightiness
Belly Locker
Bi Bone Ranch
Feast On Joey
Grew Up Anal
I Wash Dean
In Orgy Test
Jerk Fry Fest
Lips Do Karma
Lunge Back
Rape Karl
Reach The Sun
Roach Toast
Satanic As Frog
Sleek Stove
Terrible Pen
Tiger Murk
Wad Isle Unit

In order of appearance: Ryan Idol, Paul Carrigan, Diesel Washington, Colby Keller, Conner Habib, Joey Stefano, Paul Wagner, Aiden Shaw, Tiger Tyson, Jeff Stryker, Arpad Miklos, Buck Angel, Al Parker, Chase Hunter, Scott O’Hara, François Sagat, Steve Kelso, Peter Berlin, Tim Kruger and Austin Wilde.

40 Gayish Portmanteaux

autofellatio
bash
bi-curious
bootylicious
brunch
cybersex
fantabulous
foreskin
gayby
gaydar
gaysian
ginormous
glitzy
guesstimate
guyliner
homophobe
horndog
jockstrap
labradoodle
manbag
mangina
manscape
manwich
moobs
motel
murse
poopshoot
pornado
prissy
screenager
sexcapade
sexercise
sexpert
sext
shemale
teabag
tucknology
twincest
urinalysis
yestergay

35 Islands Where It’s Okay to Have Buttsex

Aruba
Australia
Bahamas
Bermuda
British Virgin Islands
Cape Verde
Cayman Islands
Christmas Island
Cuba
Cyprus
Dominican Republic
Easter Island
Falkland Islands
Fiji
French Polynesia
Guadeloupe
Guam
Haiti
Hawaii
Iceland
Ireland
Isle of Man
Japan
Madagascar
Malta
Martinique
New Zealand
Puerto Rico
Saint Martin
Samoa
Taiwan
Thailand
United Kingdom
Vanuatu
Wallis and Futuna

50 Male-Male Romance Novels

50 Shades of Gay
Abercrombie Zombie
And Call Me in the Morning
Angels on Top
As Meat Loves Salt
Blacque/Bleu
But My Boyfriend Is
The Cellmate
Conduct Unbecoming
The Cranberry Hush
Dirty Laundry
Do Not Feed the Platypus, Please
Edward Unconditionally
Feast, Stray, Love
Fingersmith
Going Down
Handyman
His Christmas Wish
Hot Head
I’ll Be Your Drill, Soldier
Icecapade
Kitten
Little Stalker
The Locker Room
Luck in the Shadows
Man Candy
The Nothingness of Ben
On Picking Fruit
The Other Guy
Outfoxed
Packing Heat
Personal Shopper
Pricks and Pragmatism
Puzzle Me This
Quid Pro Quo
Salty Aftertaste
Scared Stiff
Soft Focus
St-st-stuffed
Strawberries for Dessert
Stronger in Your Hands
Super Sock Man
Tag Team
Tech Support
To The Max
Trucker Fags in Denial
Trusting Thomas
An Uncommon Whore
Wake Me Up Inside
Yours to Command

40 Sex Positions

Anti-social Straddle
Around the World
Bagpiping
Butterfly
Circle Jerk
Cliffhanger
Climbing the Tree
Cowgirl
Daisy Chain
Doggy Style
Double Y
Fire Hydrant
French Sandwich
Gazelle and Stallion
Helicopter
Lazy Thinker
London Bridge
Piledriver
Pogo Stick
Princeton Rub
Pyramid
Rear Admiral
Rusty Trombone
Seated Scissors
Seesaw
Sexy Siesta
Sit on My Face
Sitting Bull
Sixty-nine
Spit Roast
Splitting Bamboo
Spooning
Starfish
Stopperage
Sunny Side Up
Suspended Congress
T-square
Two Mountains
Venus Flytrap
Viennese Oyster

50 Euphemisms for Masturbation

adjust the antenna
badger the witness
bash the bishop
beat off
beat your meat
bop the baloney
bust a nut
burp the baby
butter the corn
change gears
charm the snake
chase the weasel
choke the chicken
cuddle the kielbasa
dance with the one-eyed sailor
dunk your dolphin
flog the log
get off
grease your pole
have a wank
hold the sausage hostage
jack off
jenny
jerk off
jerk the gherkin
love the Muppet
make the bald man puke
paint the ceiling
play chopsticks
paddle the pickle
peel the banana
polish the knob
pound your pud
pull off
punch the clown
rope the pony
rub one out
self-service
smack Johnny behind the ears
spank the monkey
stroke the salami
strum the banjo
take care of business
wack off
walk the dog
whip it
whittle the wood
whistle dixie
yank the chain
yank your doodle dandy

30 Words for Male Prostitute

b-boy
butt peddler
call boy
cheap date
cinderfella
commercial queer
dial-a-dick
escort
fanny boy
fourty-four
gay-for-pay
gigolo
he-ho
hooker
hot dog
hustler
joy boy
manwhore
peg boy
prostidude
punk
rent boy
sailor bait
sanky-panky
slut
sporting goods
street walker
stud
toyboy
trade

20 Villainous Homosexuals

By Danny Calvi

25 Gay Softball Teams

Bat Boys
Bitch Pudding
Chainwhips
Double Headers
Fluid Force
Grass Stains
Hard Attack
Hooters & Shooters
In Your Faces
Knuckle Up
Manniax
Masterbatters
Mood Swings
Muffin Tops
Powerstrokes
Purple Orphans
Rabid Kittens
Ramrod Rangers
Rough Riders
Seventh Inning Stretchmarks
Sons of Pitches
Three Dykes You’re Out
U’Haulers
Unicorn Booty Patrol
Woody’s X-plosion

35 Bottles of Poppers

Amyl Night
Bolt
Blue Boy
Climax
Crypt-tonight
Cyclone
Discoroma
DV8
Fist
Hardon
Hardware
Hellfire
Hit
Hombre
Jungle Juice
Leather Eagle
Locker Room
Mama Poppers
Man Scent
Mile Migh
Mint Bang
Natural Brute
Orbit
Oz
Phuck
Pig Sweat
Pink Pussy Cat
Quicksilver
Ram
Rochefort
Rush
Taiwan Blue
Thrust
Voltage
Zap

45* U.S. Gay Bars Named with a Plural Noun

By Nick Schiarizzi

Bar Codes
Boxxes
Buddies
Bulldogs
Celebrities
Changes
Cocktails
Crossroads
Cutters
Digs
Dudes
Embers
Faces
Flicks
Friends
Good Friends
High-Tops
Images
Jesters
Korners
Legends
Libations
Masks
Mixers
Neighbours
Numbers
Pecs
Pieces
Puzzles
Rocks
Rumors
Senses
Shooters
Slammers
Tapas
Tracks
Triangles
Tropics
Trunks
Try-Angles
Uncles
Visions
Whiskers
Woofs
Zippers

*Nick tells us that this is in fact ‘a definitive list’ of all the gay bars in the United States named using a plural noun. Nick’s night club experiment Cheryl
is not named after a plural noun.

15 Celebrity Dildos

Adam Dexter Dong
Aiden Shaw Supercock
Bam Huge Realistic Cock
Brandon Lee CyberSkin 7X Vibrating Cock with Balls
Eddie Diaz Sensafirm Penis
François Sagat Realistic Cock
Jeff Stryker Realistic Cock
Jesse Rock Transsexual Hard Cock and Balls
John Holmes UR3 Cock
Kevin Dean Virtual Reality Cock
Marco Banderas Uncut CyberSkin Cock
Mia Isabella Ride My Big Cock
Michael Lucas Sensafirm Cock
Otto Bauers Ball Banger Cock
Tyler Knight Futurotic Vibrating Cock

13 homosexuals with two first names

Chad Allen
Kristen Bjorn
Anderson Cooper
Barney Frank
Elton John
Matt Lucas
Ricky Martin
George Michael
Al Parker
Cole Porter
Arthur Russell
Joey Stefano
Ricky Wilson

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