Tight-Assed Canadian Sailor Attempts Assfuck by a Femme Top with a Mushroom Head

Text by
Tom Bardwell

CAMBRIDGE, MASSACHUSETTS — Living in New England has its perks, especially during Boston Navy Week, an annual homecoming giving locals a ‘first-hand’ opportunity to meet sailors. With the repeal of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, men in uniform were packing the bars all along the Eastern seaboard. The steamy heat of summer made me want to fuck, so I decided to take my chances at the local gay bar, Dirty Dice. I was radiating chocolatey heat, and hoping to live out my fantasy of bedding an enlisted man.

I hadn’t cruised the downstairs for too long when the sailor caught my attention. He cut a tall and angular frame in his dress whites. The sailor felt it too, and grabbed me as we passed each other. I grabbed back. His ass felt amazingly tight. I told him I wanted to bury my cock deep in his ass. ‘Bring it,’ he said. I gestured for us to get our things and jet. The sailor made a call to his staff sergeant, giving him my full address and arranging for a shuttle service to take him back to his hotel.

As we walked to my place, the streetlights illuminated his features. He had flawless skin and the cutest rimmed glasses framing his boyish face. ‘Can we be loud?’ he asked. ‘Yes,’ I replied, hanging on my apartment doorknob to steady myself. ‘Good, because I’m looking to get fucked hard.’

As we were getting naked, it struck me that the sailor’s cock rivaled mine in size, although mine was thicker and more curved. His body was slightly muscular, and he had a large wildcat tattoo with some initials scrawled on his left pec. Pink balls swinging, he folded his uniform neatly, leaving his matching white socks on.

Foreplay came naturally, but my grip was not tight enough for the sailor. ‘Get in there!’ he said. I yanked a bit harder, and then he pushed my hands away to show me how he wanted it done. ‘Please don’t pull on my shit the way you pull on yours,’ I said. ‘I’m very sensitive.’ I stare into his eyes and begin to really pull, twist, tug and massage his cock with vise-like intensity.

Then I started to finger him… Sensing that he was right on the edge, I asked his permission to put on a condom. ‘Yeah, fuck me!’ he said. I opened my dresser drawer, lubed and wrapped my dick with precision, and was back into bed in a flash.

At first, I entered gently — my mushroom head can be quite a challenge for bottoms — which made him moan. Then he threw me onto my back. ‘Let me ride you,’ he said. For the next hour, we tried every position under the sun, but he just couldn’t relax. ‘I want you, but it hurts,’ he said. During each change of position, my hardon deflated more and more. We fell into a sex puzzle.

Then the sailor took me in his arms, and kissed me deeply. His lips were so juicy. He offered to give me a blowjob, and my word… Those soft, juicy lips of his felt incredible. Gagging and slurping loudly, he used his hand while sucking me off. ‘You’re going to make me shoot,’ I warned him, and then splashed his chin with cum.

Standing up to grab a towel, my nose caught the smell before my eyes could see… I hadn’t noticed that the sailor had puked. When I turned on the bedroom light, I saw two enormous puddles of bright yellow vomit. His uniform, folded neatly on the other side of his head, was unscathed. ‘Sorry, I didn’t realize how much I had to drink,’ he said on his way to the toilet. That beautiful porcelain ass mocked me as it walked down the hall.

It was 5:30 A.M. and my room reeked of puke. I began cleaning up the mess while the sailor helped himself to a shower and a sandwich, and then returned to supervise the cleanup. I handed him his dress whites. He tried to kiss me, but I denied him. ‘My mouth is clean now,’ he said. But the stench of his party foul lingered…

Our goodbye was quick, yet cordial. I stepped into my tub and caught a glimpse of the sailor’s yellow socks neatly rolled up in the trash.

Published on 17 April 2013